You've Got A Friend...

You’ve Got A Friend

Last week I was playing around with my iphone and changing the sounds that it makes to get my attention. Sadly, I got sucked into the world of ringtones online. I started looking for a ringtone that would encourage me to answer my phone. I am not a phone person and never have been. When I was a kid growing up, I would ride my bike all over town to go and be with my friends rather than call them on the phone. The phone has always just seemed so impersonal to me. This is one of the downsides to our fragmented culture, that we have resigned ourselves to technology to make contact with one another. I am aware that if I am going to live in this century that I will need to be flexible in how I communicate but I will always prefer human presence over modern technology.

Now, back to the ringtone. I finally landed on a jingle from the song by Carole King, You’ve Got a Friend. This is probably my all time favorite song because it speaks to my soul and touches the deepest part of me. Friends are valuable treasures in life. Some friendships are for a season and others last a lifetime. I am truly thankful for the people in my life that call me their friend. I know that true friendship is costly and so I do not take it lightly when another person chooses to walk in friendship with me. Last night I watched the last movie in the series of the Lord of The Rings and was struck by how the ending of the movie is built around friendships. In one of the final scenes, the hobbit, Sam, is carrying his, friend, Frodo to the top of the volcanic mountain so that Frodo can cast his burden (a ring) into the fire of the mountain and be set free. The beauty of Sam and Frodo’s relationship was that they stuck together through good times and bad times. That is a very difficult journey to take with another.

I read something today written by Joan Chittister that stood out to me in regards to friendship. Friends carry our burdens in their own hearts and give us the wisdom of distance to deal with them. We live in a broken world and all of us are broken people. We need to have friends in our lives that we know will not just enjoy the good side of us but will also endure that dark side of us as well. We all have a dark side that we must face and like Frodo we must find a way to let go of our burdens and be set free. Our friends are those who journey with us to the edge and help is let go of those things that so easily entangle us. Letting go of our burdens is an ongoing process and God gives us a lifetime to practice.

I am thankful to my family and friends who are committed to sticking with me through the good times and the bad times. You are truly my friends and live in the deepest part of my heart.

Throughout the Bible, there are many names for God and the one that has been most powerful to me is Friend. Jesus was called the friend of sinners! Jesus hung out with people that were not considered very loveable but he saw them in their essence. God is my friend. God sees me in all of my darkness and loves me anyway.

What more could I ask for?

When I hear this song I imagine God singing it over me.

When you're down and troubled
And you need some loving care
And nothin', nothin' is goin' right
Close your eyes and think of me
And soon I will be there
To brighten up even your darkest night

You just call out my name 
And you know wherever I am
I'll come runnin' to see you again
Winter, spring, summer or fall
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there 
You've got a friend

If the sky above you
Grows dark and full of clouds
And that old north wind begins to blow 
Keep your head together 
And call my name out loud
Soon you'll hear me knockin' at your door

You just call out my name
And you know wherever I am 
I'll come runnin',  
to see you again
Winter, spring, summer or fall
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there, yes I will

Now ain't it good to know 
that you've got a friend 
When people can be so cold
They'll hurt you, yes, and desert you 
And take your soul if you let them
Oh, but don't you let them.

You just call out my name 
And you know wherever I am
I'll come runnin,
to see you again
Winter, spring, summer or fall
All you have to do is call
And I'll be there, yes I will
You've got a friend.

By the way, I never did get the ringtone to work on my phone but if you call me I will answer.

Blessed Are The Peacemakers...

This morning I attended a Memorial Service for fallen law enforcement officers. Nine years ago my brother-in-law, Brad, was killed in the line of duty. Going to this yearly service always brings back many memories of times past. So many of these memories are painful because the ceremony itself is a reminder of Brad’s memorial service. There are bagpipes playing Amazing Grace, Taps, Roll Call of the fallen officers, and a 21 gun salute. All of these sights and sounds bring back the sharp reality of Brad’s death and the deep sadness we feel from losing him.

Brad and Bruce

After we left the service Bruce and I went out to lunch and reminisced of happier times with Brad. Bruce asked me what my favorite memory of Brad was and I could not name just one. Brad was a very warmhearted man. He had a way of making anyone feel valued in his presence. I had many meaningful conversations with him over the years and enjoyed being with him greatly. He was also a very funny man as well. He knew how to take a situation and create humor that brought life and light-heartedness to all. So most of the time that I reflect on Brad, it is with a smile on my face.

Brad was a peaceful man. This made him an excellent officer because he knew that his duty was to be a catalyst for peace in his community. On the night that he died, he was caught in a domestic situation that had gone from hostile to violent. So much suffering occurred that night for everyone that was there. All of the officers at the scene were seeking a peaceful way to steer the actions of a volatile man in a way that would end in safety and peace. Unfortunately, this is not what happened and many hearts were broken that night. Brad lost his life that night and for those of us that knew him and loved him,  a little piece of us died with him. 

I am thankful for Brad’s life here on earth. He lives on in the lives of his family. His little grandson, and namesake, Bradley was there today sitting on his dad’s lap. He never had the chance to know his grampa. He will grow up hearing about his grampa and the life that his grampa lived and the sacrificial way that he died. He will know his grampa through the memories of his family. Each member of Brad’s family carries a piece of him in their hearts and so he lives on in us.

Not long after Brad died, my daughter, Emily, wrote a song that pretty much says what we feel. I can’t listen to this song without shedding a tear. Here are the lyrics to the song: 

Without You

Daddy I’m hurting,

And the tears still flow.

Nothing’s that easy,

Cause I miss you so.

Child so precious,

I swaddled in blankets.

I never imagined,

You’d leave us so soon.

It’s not that easy to pretend that life is grand,

When we’re still hurting.

And though I try to see the brighter side,

It’s hard to do without you.

Without you.

Without you.

Cause were still getting used to life without you.

Brother I’m trying,

To keep them together.

But the sheep seem to scatter,

When the Shepherd goes home.

And grampa I’m sorry,

That I never knew you.

Cause I was a baby,

When you passed away.

It’s not that easy to pretend that life is grand,

When we’re still hurting.

And though I try to see the brighter side,

It’s hard to do without you.

Without you.

Without you.

Cause were still getting used to life without you.

Still missing you Brad, and feeling cheated by a life cut short...

Fashion Statement

This morning I read the story of David and Goliath and saw something new. Now I have read this story countless times and yet there is always a new way of seeing when we read stories over and over. That is why we can also watch movies many times without getting bored. There always seems to be more to see and grow from in good stories that are told well.

Anyway, back to David. When David was getting ready to fight Goliath, Saul gave David his coat of armor and helmet to wear to fight the giant. After getting all suited up and walking around a bit, David tells Saul, “I cannot go in these, because I am not used to them.”  In the past, I have heard this story described from the pulpit many times and what has been emphasized is the fact that David was young and so the armor was probably to big for him. While this might be true, this is not what the story says. David did not say “This armor doesn’t fit, could you find one my size?” The fact that he was “not used to them” is repeated twice. David was confident and comfortable in his own skin. He knew who he was and was willing to go into battle as David, not wearing someone elses armor.

I have never been much into fashion.

It seems that in our culture we clothe ourselves to go into battle with the world of acceptance. We hang all sorts of items from our bodies as an expression of who we are and how we want to be seen by others. We have all sorts of etiquette when it comes to clothing.

When I was a little girl, I hated Easter because of what I had to wear to church. The fancy dresses were always itchy and uncomfortable. Do I look happy in this photo? I actually liked church but I disliked the fashion statement that I was forced to make. I couldn’t wait to get home and change into comfortable clothing. Those dresses did not express who I was very well. This kind of “dressing up” has never appealed to me. Growing up in the sixties, girls were not allowed to wear pants to school. I hated this rule because it made life difficult on the playground. It is hard to play your best in a dress. When I was in the seventh grade, the school finally changed the dress code for girls allowing us to wear pants to school. I was very excited about this change but my mother was not. She would only let me wear pants on Fridays, however, I finally wore her down.

So, do the clothes that we wear really define who we are?

For David the answer was no. He felt uncomfortable in Saul’s attire. David knew that “the clothing did not make the man.” He was tuned into himself and into the power of the God he loved and served. I seem to recall another time when he was ridiculed for dancing naked before the Lord.

I guess he just wasn’t much into fashion either.

When people see me, I don’t want it to be my clothes that impress them. My desire is to shine the light of God on those I meet along the way. And in turn, I do not want my focus to be on the exterior of others but rather to see them as God sees them.

So what does God see when God is looking at you?

These words from the letter to the church in Galatia say it well:

 So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

Galatians 3:26-28

May you be clothed in Christ today.