Violence Against Women

Anita Hill

     I love watching movies because other people's stories inform me about my life. I recently viewed the HBO movie entitled, Confirmation. The movie is about the 1991 hearings conducted by the Senate Judiciary Committee regarding the allegations brought against Clarance Thomas of Sexual Harassment by Anita Hill. I remember watching this hearing back in 1991. Anita Hill was in her mid thirties back then and so was I. As the story goes, there are two opposing views on what really happened between Anita Hill and Clarance Thomas. It was basically a he said, she said, situation. So when a movie is made about an historical event there will always be controversy. People on both sides come out to defend their position. 

     What struck me in reliving this historical moment was that Ms. Hill did not go looking for trouble; it came knocking on her doorstep. It did not go well for her to speak out against the powers that be; that being the Republican party and the President of the United States. This was a woman who was the valedictorian of her high school graduating class, graduated with honors in college and then graduated with honors from Yale Law School. I doubt that it was ever her dream to bring down a potential supreme court judge. In the years following her testimony at the hearings, she received death threats, bomb threats, and sexual violence threats. Her reputation was drug through the mud. This was a high price to pay for an aspiring young woman. Her decision to speak out changed the course of her life. 

     Another interesting fact from the movie, and yes, I checked and it was factual, was Ms. Hill's willingness to take a lie detector test regarding her testimony. She was found to be truthful. Clarance Thomas refused to take such a test.

     So how prevalent is violence against women in our world? The answer to this question is easy to find. Just listen to the women in your own life. Listen to their stories of sexual harassment, of gender discrimination, of sexual abuse. These are struggles that all women share around the globe.

     I have my own stories. Growing up female had its challenges. When I was a very small child, I was at the home of a close family friend. The man of the house was a deviant man. He like to expose himself in public. One day while I was at his house he walked out of the bathroom toward me with his pants down. I was very scared and confused at his behavior. At the time I didn't tell anyone. This created a new and lasting fear in me. 

     Later in my life, when I was thirteen and becoming a young woman, life with boys became quite difficult and confusing. Just like every young girl my age, I wanted to be liked and accepted by boys. I still remember the first time a boy groped me at a party.   These years of my life were spent fending off unwanted sexual advances from boys. Often times boys were very aggressive with me sexually and this created more fear in me. I spent a lot of time running away from boys. I lost boyfriends because I didn't want to engage in sexual activity. These are just a few examples of the indignities that I have suffered at the hands of boys. 

     Throughout my adult life there have been many more times that I have been misjudged by men because of my gender. I was fortunate to find the love of my life in my early twenties and I have enjoyed the love and affection of this man for the past thirty-seven years. I am thankful for the kindness, gentleness and respect that he has given to me as his wife and as a woman. We have had many conversations about the struggles that women face in our world. We have not always agreed but we are always willing to listen to one another. 

     The struggles that I have encountered in my life pale in comparison to what many woman have had to endure. As a spiritual director I have listened to many women and the suffering that they have lived through. My hope is that we can find strength and solidarity as women by sharing our stories. 

Do you have a story to tell?